The Blueprint to Proper Healing - Part 1

2 Samuel 2:13-23 (ESV)

"David said to Nathan, 'I have sinned against the Lord.' And Nathan said to David, 'The Lord also has put away your sin; you shall not die. Nevertheless, because by this deed you have utterly scorned the Lord, the child who is born to you shall die.' Then Nathan went to his house.

And the Lord afflicted the child that Uriah's wife bore to David, and he became sick. David therefore sought God on behalf of the child. And David fasted and went in and lay all night on the ground. And the elders of his house stood beside him, to raise him from the ground, but he would not, nor did he eat food with them. On the seventh day the child died. And the servants of David were afraid to tell him that the child was dead, for they said, “Behold, while the child was yet alive, we spoke to him, and he did not listen to us. How then can we say to him the child is dead? He may do himself some harm.” But when David saw that his servants were whispering together, David understood that the child was dead. And David said to his servants, “Is the child dead?” They said, “He is dead.” Then David arose from the earth and washed and anointed himself and changed his clothes. And he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. He then went to his own house. And when he asked, they set food before him, and he ate. Then his servants said to him, “What is this thing that you have done? You fasted and wept for the child while he was alive; but when the child died, you arose and ate food.” He said, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept, for I said, ‘Who knows whether the Lord will be gracious to me, that the child may live?’ But now he is dead. Why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he will not return to me.”

A Broken Heart

I happened to come across a powerful account in 2 Samuel 12 after I had committed to the healing process and it was a game changer for me. In this deeply sorrowful account, King David has just lost the son his wife Bathsheba had given birth to. He lost the son because of the sins he had committed, both in having an affair with Bathsheba and then having her husband killed to cover up the scandal. So on top of having the weight of guilt from such devastating sin, he loses his precious child.

Most would say that losing a child is by far one of the hardest things a person could go through. Maybe you are personally experiencing such grief now. The loss of someone we love is hard to manage whether that's through death, divorce, or break-up.

Worship With All Your Heart

What David did after his child died is remarkable and truly an example for us in our healing process. Scripture shows that the first thing David did was worship God. In fact, it’s such a hard act to comprehend that David is questioned for doing it. So why did he? Because David understands he can’t change what happened, but he can choose how to respond. David knew that above all else, God was good no matter the season and that the focus must be on Him, not on the circumstances.

As I poured over these words in my season of grief, I asked myself an important question.

“If David could worship in his grief of losing a child, couldn’t I worship at the ruins of a relationship?”

Shouldn’t my appropriate response be to seek after God with all my heart, even out of the depths of my pain? So I worshipped and found that as I did, the grief lifted and comfort abounded.

As hard as it might feel to be thankful, it’s necessary. In fact, as soon as you’re done reading this I hope you will turn on some worship music, begin seeking God, and worship the One who has saved you from an eternity of constant sorrow.

In the fourth installment of this series, we’ll continue to look at the blueprint for proper healing.